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Paint Job/Transcript
(Accept mission) Nakayama: It's been FOREVER and I still haven't gotten a reply from Jack. Maybe he needs to know I'm for realz. Ooh, ooh! Go find some paint and give it to a claptrap unit. I have an idea! (Approach servicing station) Nakayama: There should be some paint in the claptrap servicing station. (Pick up paint) Nakayama: Great! Now give that paint to a claptrap and ask it to draw an image of my adoration -- a testament to the man who brought me here! Yellow's his favorite color, and appearances matter so if everything's yellow he'll love me! (Enter Jack's Office) Nakayama: Find a claptrap near Jack's office! After the robot makes the painting, Jack will walk by it EVERY DAY! (Meet Worker CL4P-TP) Worker CL4P-TP: Look at these schmucks, willing away their digital lives at a computer. HA! Thank the Almighty Robot Policeman I'm not stuck at a desk like THESE jokers! Nakayama: That one! He's not busy! He can create my MASTERPIECE! (Talk to Worker CL4P-TP) *'Athena (if present):' Uhhh... Nakayama wants you to draw something that shows how much he likes Jack. *'Wilhelm (if present):' Some scientist wants to diddle Jack. Wants you to draw somethin' romantic or... somethin'. *'Nisha (if present):' Egghead's got a thing for Jack, for obvious reasons. Need you to draw something that'll get him to second base with the big man. *'Claptrap (if present):' Think you could draw something that shows the depths to which Nakayama would go to impress Jack! *'Jack2 (if present):' Uhhh, just... draw Jack lookin' pretty or somethin'. This is all... REALLY weird to me. *'Aurelia (if present):' Hello! Draw a picture of Jack so that an incredibly awkward romance may blossom. Worker CL4P-TP: Awww! I wanted to dance! (Give paint) Worker CL4P-TP: Who knew I could paint as well as I could dance? Jack: What the hell is that claptrap painting? It looks like a skag dry-humping a vending machine! Nice color, though. I'll get it washed off later. Nakayama: Rrgh, he doesn't understand! Let's send him some flowers -- go find a few I've planted around the station. (Pick up 1 flower) Nakayama: I planted these flowers myself. My doctorate's actually in horticulture, I just pretended to be a geneticist so Jack would hire me. Ugh, I love him so hard -- What? I didn't say anything. What? (Pick up 2nd flower) Nakayama: Mmm... blood orchids. They symbolize death, and permanence, and... open-mouth kissing. (Pick up 3rd flower) Nakayama: Alright! That's all of the flowers we'll need. Just leave them outside of Jack's office! (Plant flowers) Nakayama: Wonderful! He'll HAVE to acknowledge those. He can't miss them! He'll finally notice me! Hyperion: Fire hazard. Flowers blocking entrance to office. Please immolate flowers to prevent fire hazard. Nakayama: What? No... (Burn flowers) Nakayama: NOOOOOOOO! Jack: Alright, who the hell's been defacing my station? Show yourself! Nakayama: It's me, sir! Professor Nakayama. I'm the gene-- Jack: --Yeahyeah. Don't care. You're pissing me off with youw weird hijinx, Nakytama. Cut it out or I'll have you forcefed into a weapon grinder. Friggin' jackass. Nakayama: Did you hear that? He almost pronounced my name correctly! That means he pretty much LOVES me! Come on back! WE DID IT! (Turn in) Nakayama: I DID IT! Jack and I will be together FOREVER! AHAHAHA! *'Athena (if present):' You have my pity. *'Wilhelm (if present):' You're weird, dude. *'Nisha (if present):' Man, it is really gonna break your heart when I hit that. *'Claptrap (if present):' Man, what a loser! And that means a lot coming from ME. *'Jack2 (if present):' H'okay, walking away now, in fear for my life… *'Aurelia (if present):' Oh, he's an absolute buffoon. Breaks the heart. Almost. Category:Transcripts